To know Lou is to like Lou. He is laid back, and always smiling. He treats everyone fairly, until they push him past his limit. Basically, if you don't like Lou, it's typically because there's something wrong with you.
Lou never knows a stranger, and talks freely with people. One of his favorite activities was to shoot the crud with the other drivers at the truck stop. Although he had me on the road for the longest time, he remembered the lonely days on the road, and what it means to have someone hold a conversation and smile, letting you know you're not alone.
Lou helped in almost every situation he came across. The exception of the rule came on an early morning run (just after midnight) on I-70 in Indiana, right before Illinois. A suicidal woman stepped out and stopped in front of our truck. He knew it was a situation better handled by another woman, and let me handle it, while he watched from the cab, until the situation between her boyfriend and her required back up from him.
He didn't care what company you're with. He'd call out to every truck on the shoulder, to see if they needed help. Once, one did. He walked back a mile to try and help the guy, to no avail. He still had to be towed off. An old man came up to him in negative temps and a snow storm, asking help sliding his tandems. He helped a Werner driver learn where to put coolant in and what the coolant light meant. He re-routed for several drivers who needed help with break downs. To him, a little extra time or miles was worth it if he could help someone. Two of the things he enjoyed most were Wishes on Wheels Midsouth and Trucking Santas, for he could see the help.
The load above changed something on helping matters. Lou severely damaged his back while transloading it from trailer to trailer. He herniated a disc in two different spots, causing nerve root compression, facet hypertrophy, and pressing the disc into his thecal sac (the sac of fluid protecting your spinal cord). He fought the pain for six months. Then, one day, he couldn't even climb into a truck. Within two weeks, his world had been turned upside down. He no longer drives, for he ended up having issues getting the brake pedal to agree to his leg, for he had issues pushing the brake pedal down hard enough to stop. He is awaiting the doctor to pull his medical card and sign off on disability, and has already secured a disability attorney. We are also a month into waiting for a decision from St. Christopher Trucker Fund. He now has me tend to him around the clock, for he can't move very far before his body is ready to quit, but still tries to be hard headed about it.
The hardest part, though, has been to accept that he needed help. Our friends realized that him being done trucking meant that we were in bad shape. They realized this meant that we didn't have the money for the doctors or even for rent, and they weren't taking no for an answer of being there to help. We literally came off the truck, not even having a place to live. Lou tried to refuse their help, not wanting to have it get in the way of Trucking Santas. Finally, Mitchell Stein told me to make a fundraiser on YouCaring. So, that night, while Lou was asleep, I swallowed my pride, and did just that. The turn out was amazing, and humbling. Many times Lou and I were both left speechless and in tears, realizing how blessed we were to have such great friends. We would like to take a few minutes to thank everyone who helped out, including the anonymous people I can't list on here. We would like to thank those that we know will be continuing to help us as we wait for security and for my work to start paying off. We would also like to thank those that couldn't help, but have been there with tremendous moral support. Having all of you there, and knowing you care have made a huge difference in our lives. It has given Lou a new belief in humanity also.
We would like to thank Todd McCann, who couldn't help himself, but ended up relentlessly pursuing others to get involved, with good results. We would also like to thank Evan Lockridge from The Lockridge Report, for raising awareness of the situation online and on the radio.
We would also like to thank Brenny Transportation, Lone Star Large Cars, Jack Goldstein, Michael Goldstein, Christy Kuppler, Thomas Heatherman, Joel Sims, Gracie Berry, Jana Huolt, Jeremiah Adams (especially for hauling all our heavy stuff for us), Shirie Shipp, Lightning Logistics (Bekins), Riggs & Recruits, Sarge Lewis (he's been our transportation, and forced us to eat out), Brian Peters, Jacquie Vincent, Shane ?, David Beem, Jurgen & Tracy Reid, Matt Grigsby, Michelle Sutton, Mike & Tina DiBartolo, Porter Corn, Everett & Melody Appelt, George Baisden, L. Dawn Tait, Mike Laffey, NosillaCast on Twitter, Deuspenny on Twitter, Good Time Charlie, Todd Neva, Steve & Michelle Piatkowski, Yvonne Mansini, Carrie Marrero, Timothy Boswinkle, Danielle Donnelly, Sheri Olson, Ang Anderson, King (who is King?), Dale Buckley, Peter Toft, Hole in the Head (James Hightower), Bartkomt Overal, Mack & Becca Allison, Roadway Safety Store, Jim Johnson, Tess & Ravin Smith, Frog Truck Escort, Tiffany & Allen Parker, MaidenAmerica on Twitter, Eddie Gudino, Marty Hunt, Lisa Yingling, Mitchell Stein, Mark Fornaro, Bear and T Whiterhurst, Deb Swenson, Tim Nichols, the anons, and the person who threatened to kill me if I ever mentioned his name in so many words. I will adjust this list as more people step up, for they deserve full credit.
Thank you again, everyone, for your full support of whatever kind, while we go through such a hard transition, I'd list the names of everyone who reposted, but that would be enough to fill up an entire book. You've touched us to no end, and we will never forget the love and support.
So that I don't have to answer how to help every time that someone would like to help, I'm including an easy donation button at the bottom of this. Thank yall again! We can never repay yall for what your love has done for us.
You know the old addage, "Do unto others as you'd want them to do unto you?" It should also have a twist of "Do unto your back as you'd want your back to do unto you."
Everyone knows your back has your back. But, if you don't have your back's back, your back won't have your back anymore. (Confusing enough yet?)
I am writing this in hopes someone out there will listen, heed my advice, and save themselves heartaches, headaches, and lifeaches. (Yes, I just made the word up.)
Men and women are both severely hard headed. Any time there's pain, unless the person is a hypochondriac or schizophrenic, they try to shake it off. They try to make themselves believe it'll get better, or that it's a mind over matter thing. Anyone reading this has been there. I was there. When I was temporarily paralyzed, my stupid self believed I'd wake up the next morning and walk. It didn't happen. I'm lucky when it happens now, but now at least I know what the issue is.
Lou shook it off, denied it, did the mind over matter thing, for six months. Six months is a long time to allow a severe back injury to not be treated. Now, six months later, his hardedness has led to his "world being turned upside down."
In October, we took an emergency trans load, paying through the nose for us to go from Amarillo to Albuquerque empty, then from Albuquerque to Tracy loaded. The truck dealership the load was abandoned at had agreed to help with the transload when the big carrier brokering the load out spoke to them. They didn't. We had five 5000-7000 pound military trailers to attempt to transload by ourselves.
As I changed into shorts and a tank top (I was wearing slacks and a blouse) to be able to assist in the transload, Lou chose to try and do it alone. His main concern was always my back, and he knew how much pain I'd be in if I helped switch the load to our trailer. He actually moved one trailer onto our trailer, but his body screamed, and he had to wait for me. When we started getting ready to continue, two Knight Transportation drivers jumped in to help out. After we moved another trailer with their help, a Marten Transportation driver jumped out. I would like to thank those three from the bottom of our hearts. If you guys ever read this, the camaraderie shown by the three of you was off the top, and we will never forget the hard work it took to help us out that day.
If it weren't for the three gentlemen helping us out, I do believe Lou and I would have both been in the emergency room that day together. Lou walked away with pain he had never felt before.
Let me backtrack on Lou for a minute, then I'll fill you in on the rest of the story and give you advice to take to the bank.
Lou started bull riding in high school. He quit when he realized that, although he might be good, he'd never make it to the pro circuit. He then went to bed bugging. He was one of those guys that you see carrying appliances by theirselves or see them carrying a couch on their back, thinking, "He's going to regret that later on in life." He then moved onto flatbedding, and specialized hauling. Twelve hour tarp jobs were nothing, helping move heavy freight was part of the job. All of this, from high school on, caused the issues to come around with the ferocity that they did. This isolated incident was just the straw that broke the camel's back.
We had to stop early the next day. Lou was in so much pain that he couldn't stand to be in the driver's seat. We got a hotel, he stretched out, and there was no change the next morning. A few days later, the pain was still nagging at him, and we took him to a chiropractor, who gave him some short lived relief.
For the next six months, anything from sleeping wrong to twisting wrong to lifting tarps to just about anything made Lou's back scream in pain. He tried to treat it with long, hot baths, OTC pain relievers, and went to a massage therapist on our last trip through Primm. The pain became excruciating after the massage. By the time we made it to Cedar Rapids, he was having problems lifting himself into the truck. We went to the emergency room. The doctor believed it was a bulging or herniating disc, and ordered him to bed rest. Three days later, he was feeling no better, so we went to a different E.R. Same conclusion came from there, except they told him no bed rest. Neither E.R. could order an MRI though. We took our load to PA, then brought one to TX. We then went to a third E.R., trying to get an immediate MRI. No luck there either. So, the doctor ordered the MRI for us.
Lou's world has been turned upside down. An hour before the MRI yesterday, his company cancelled his contract. Loyalty and being the top earner mean nothing to them, and apparently, it was appropriate to kick the man who tried to overlook several contract breaches on their part down further. (We are exploring our options on how to pursue at the current time.) The hoot of it all is this shitty company knew when his MRI was, so there was no accidental timing flaw.
Today, the diagnosis came. It's grim to say the least. He's herniated at the L4-L5, with nerve root compression at the right S1. The herniation is pressing into the thecal sac and is herniated to the right and center. He's also got facet hypertrophy. Basically, he will have to have surgery, and with back surgery, your best chances are 50/50.
The worst part is, he let above named company convince him to opt out of worker's comp. Lou had never been hurt, had practiced safe lifting practices, and felt it was an extraneous expense when we were attempting to buy our truck and trailer. On top of that, we were comparing health insurance companies so we could get a policy started in June, while saving up for our premium. His injury fell in at the wrong time.
If you read this, walk away with this please! If you're in severe pain, be seen immediately. Prolonging being seen and working will only further your chances of permanent damage. If you don't have it now, get health insurance, and if you can, get worker's comp. Protect yourself. It doesn't matter your age, or how physically fit you are, shit does happen.
As for us, Lou can't walk five feet without screaming. I'm now his caregiver while in excruciating pain myself. I'm trying to sell advertising, and branching my business out to include other things, to try to pay the rent, bills, and be able to eat. Lou is done trucking for at least several months while we also struggle to figure out how we will paying for expensive specialist bills and the impending surgery with cash. We are awaiting the decision of St. Christopher's, while doing fundraising of our own. His gross was too high for any other form of assistance now, although our net, like most owner operators, would allow us to pull it if they didn't look at gross. He can't qualify for disability until the doctor signs off on it, and most people are denied two or three times before they are accepted. We've got a long road to go, and Lou is scared we won't make it.
I will keep everyone on LinkedIn, Twitter, and Facebook up-to-date on fundraising efforts by others. Right now, due to Mitchell Stein's persistence, we've got a fundraiser online you can visit here.
Please, take care of your back, and the rest of your body. It's a tough blow to have it throw you out of your life and lifestyle.
Ha! I'm laughing as I write the title to this piece due to the fact I know the vultures will swarm this one, hungry and blood thirsty. No, I'm not done. You will NEVER get that lucky!
I'm coming to you on a personal level. We're going to talk about one in a billion birth defect, and how my experience and experiments may be able to help you if you suffer from excruciating lower back pain.
My followers that have been around for a long time know I'm disabled. I was born with a one in a billion birth defect in my back. The birth defect isn't what left me disabled, it was the unexpected snap apart of said defect. Almost two months before my seventeenth birthday, I was thrown through a door in a fight. (Yes, I was a regular scrapper in my earlier years). I laid in the splintered remains of the door, allowing myself to lose my first fight ever, while crying my eyes out. This was a pain I had never felt in my entire life. The person I was fighting was my own father. He had PTSD from Nam, and this was the worst flashback yet. I handled his flashbacks, but this one caused us to be at war with each other. When he finally snapped back to, he asked all the normal questions, mainly wanting to know why I was on the floor and what in the blue hell happened to my door. My sister and I explained it to him, he helped me to my feet and patched the door.
A week later, Dad and I were talking, while I sat in the normal teenage slacker fashion. We talked regularly. My mother had abandoned us when I was four and my little sister was two, I lost my childhood to work and help take care of my sister and father. My Dad used to tell everyone I raised the whole family. I don't know how true that would be, but we became best friends due to the nature of our family. He was telling me deep secrets again. "Dad, I feel like I'm going to pass out and my legs are feeling weird," and it started. He told me to stand up and sit up straight, that would do the trick. I lifted myself up, and fell flat on my face. We did this four times before I drug myself to bed. The next morning, my left leg was stuck in a bent position and my right leg was stuck in a straight position. My dad and I figured I could use crutches, throw my weight with my arms onto the straight leg, and continue with school. It worked for a while, and all was good.
I was getting ready for the lead role in "A Midsummer Night's Dream" (Hermia) and was an honors student. Marymount Manhattan wanted me and several colleges were offering full scholarships. I was already taking college courses and readying myself for a major in psychology. (I bought the books and was absorbing all the knowledge I could get.) I would attend college while in the military, fulfilling the lineage my family had for service. I had too much to lose, so I continued dealing with the pain of the crutches to make it to school every day.
We went to Dr. Armour, our family chiropractor. He put seven, count them, SEVEN vertebrae, back into place. (Who knew you could hit a door that hard.) I'll never forget that day. He said it might hurt a little (yes, I felt what was going although I couldn't much move). When he went to snap back in my dad heard one uttered guttural sound, and I didn't move or make a sound. I couldn't even breathe for a minute. I think, to this day, that it hurt worse to have them snap out of place, than to have them snapped back into place. He lowered the table after I got my air back, and I crumpled to the floor. The straight leg couldn't hold my weight. Poor Dr. Armour tried everything in his power (he didn't use x-rays, etc) to make me walk, and with tears, had to tell my dad and I there was nothing else he could do. He was at a loss. My heart broke for him when I saw his sorrow.
My girlfriend (I believe she was my fiance at this time), Krissy and Dad finally convinced me to go to the e.r. The doctors there learned I threw a mean fist quick. Dad was smart enough to grab my fist, so the doctors missed the blow. They kept wanting to force the straight leg bent and the bent leg straight. No offense, but pain of that nature would make ANYONE swing! They had me in tears, that is pain I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. They figured, with the knowledge of seven vertebrae being popped back in, it had to be a bulged disc. Here comes the first ever x-rays and mri's I can remember. I'm not a fan of mri's. You feel like you're in a coffin. They scratched their heads, for it wasn't what they thought, and couldn't figure out what it was. They gave me meds for the pain, the muscle tightness, and the swelling, and referred me to an orthopedic specialist.
No offense, but if all orthopedic specialists are like the few I had, they need to hang up their practice! What a joke! I was now wheelchair bound. I would crawl around the house, dragging my legs behind me, pulling myself up on things to do them (the "don't sit on the counter" rule went out the window). The whole time, it was mri after mri, x-ray after x-ray, and hallucinogenic medication after the other. It was a nightmare! They sent me to physical therapy, which did no good. They sent me to every test possible, they just kept scratching their heads. I needed homebound schooling, for the school was not handicap accessible. The doctors wouldn't sign off for it, believing they would gain intelligence overnight. The school told my teachers to give me 0's on everything. Mrs. Dean and Mr. Brady continued to give me 100's (I believe they were the only two), fully aware of the situation. I had a hard choice. Drop out or flunk out. With tears in my eyes, I gave up on my dreams, and told my dad to pull me out. He went to the school the next morning, and let me drop out. He couldn't understand why a school would not be willing to work with an AP, honors, gifted & talented, student. The answer? I was a trouble maker. From what dad said, the principal was picked up by his tie. Bye bye future.
A month after I quit going to the "specialists" due to the fact they were doing nothing for me, my shooting instructor, Mr. Givens I believe, called me. He told me to go his chiropractor. "If anyone could fix me, he could." I was tired of being a guinea pig, but discussed it with Dad, and we agreed it was worth a try. We went there with the x-rays, and within a minute, he circled the problem. Eight months of doctors, and it took him a MINUTE to figure it out. He circled the x-ray in my lower back, and started with the explanation. It's a one in a billion birth defect. An extra bone came in through my pelvic region and attached to the left lobe of my lowest vertebrae. When this fusion snapped apart, it ate my sciatic nerve. He fixed me up and sat me down. The rest of the diagnosis was ominous. If I sneeze the wrong way, I will be paralyzed for the rest of my life. He started going through all the activities I loved, and told me I would be best off doing none of them. Sorry to say, but I've not heeded his advice. I know what it's like to have regrets. I regretted a lot when my legs quit working the first time, I refuse to lay down and play dead from fear!
NP Konrardy was the next in line to treat me. He devised a "cocktail" that has only been upgraded three times in twelve years. The reason why is I stay off the meds for as long as I can, and stretch them out as far as I can when I get them. I don't want to become an addict, and ensure it won't happen. NP Konrardy passed away in a Harley accident, and now it's NP Van Wettering. I saw him over a year ago. He gave me a month's worth of this "cocktail," which was stretched for three months. I will be returning to a doctor soon. My back is trying for it's last hoorah again, and the company Lou is leaving refused to acknowledge home time requests to get me to my doctor in Central Texas, FULLY aware of my back condition. Instead, people who live in Illinois would run the shuttles available in Texas. (They only allowed time off once, out of 10 requests.)
No, I do not drive. I do live in the truck. I am either in severe pain or am totally numb. I don't belong behind a wheel, and do not trust myself enough to not worry about my legs giving out and not being able to stop when YOUR family is in front of me. No, I'm not forced to stay in the truck, like so many try to believe. It is entirely my decision. I've been asked if I can handle it 100 times over by Lou. Plain and simply put, I love my life, my lifestyle, and this industry. I take the bumps with as much grace as possible. What I do to my back in the truck is no worse than me pulling doubles as a waitress on concrete floors in high velocity restaurants to support my ex-husband, so I don't need people telling me it hurts me. I will be paralyzed permanently from the waist down, it's a simple fact of life. Lou watches for medical advances daily, hoping they'll come up with the answer to my back issues. So far, the exeskeleton seems to be my best bet. No, I'm not on disability. This was Lou's decision. He would rather me be taken care of by him than have the government take care of me.
Those with back problems in trucking, I do have a few ideas for you. Understand, not everything works for everyone. But, it's options to try. First, take a minute to stretch every hour to hour and a half. I do it to get the nerves to quit feeling stressed. My best friend in the world is biofreeze. It works better than anything else out there for muscles. Drink plenty of water! Believe it or not, your water intake makes a huge difference. If you have a wife, crank the radio, and slow dance with her or two step (do it out in the truck stop in the parking lot if need be, who cares who looks at you?). The swaying of your hips when dancing helps loosen it up, as per chiropractors. Lay down with your legs bent in a 40 degree angle for 30 minutes a day. Stretch, stretch, and stretch. The atrophy those with back issues in trucking have are a lot of times associated with the lack of muscle movement. Stretching forces said muscles to flex. The nurse at the e.r., when we brought Lou there for his condochonditis, explained he could two extra strength/migraine excedrin with two ibuprofen without hurting hisself or overdosing. There is also non-narcotic toradol (sp?) by prescription. The doctor at the e.r. looked up federal regs, prescribed loritabs until the inflammation and pain stopped for Lou. He just had to wait six hours between taking it and driving. Remember, heating pads are your friends also!
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